I Didn’t Know

An open letter to those in doubt:

I didn’t know what being mistreated by a person could do to my fragile state of self.

I didn’t know just getting by in my classes would follow me to college and haunt my progression.

I didn’t know being questioned for who I was and who I had always been wasn’t an attack on me at all, but rather a showing of true character of that person.
I didn’t know I didn’t have to have a perfect body for someone to love me.

I didn’t know my self worth was so much higher than I gave myself credit for.

I didn’t know not getting in to any colleges would give me time to reflect on myself and that there is no rush to get my degree.

I didn’t know that having a few close friends rather than a lot of distant ones would eventually make me into a better person.

I didn’t know that tearing down every imperfection I have would take away my happiness and make me resent myself.

 

I didn’t know all of these things and I think there’s a reason for it.

While I didn’t know what being treated properly in an adult relationship was like, I know now.

While I didn’t know my imperfections are what make me who I am and everyone has them, I do now.

While I don’t have all the answers, I know that no one really has them. No one has the insight to be able to judge the actions of an individual and call them right or wrong.

Sometimes life can be impossible and it can pose so many questions. I think it’s important to remind us that no one actually has the answers. There is no rule book on how to handle your own life and while that would be helpful, there is a reason.

I didn’t know that the weight of the world wasn’t on my shoulders at all.

I know now that I can choose to be free of it only if I want to be.

 

XOXO,

I know now.