Honest Hustling

I really want to emphasize something before I get too ahead of myself with these posts and also my life.

Not only am I young enough to not have life figured out, but I’m human enough to admit I rarely actually have my shit together. Today I was informed that I did not get into another college I really wanted to but instead of feeling sorry for myself, I’m just going to reapply. This has inspired me to write this post about how hustling shouldn’t be so damn serious.

Most days I know I have 5 sections of math homework due soon and instead I choose to watch friends and procrastinate like it’s my effing job. I have PILES of laundry and no clothes left for work and I’ll turn on hgtv and decide rearranging my room is a better use of my time. I’m late for work 9 times out of 10, I’ll forget to eat lunch but eat 3 times as much for dinner. I skip workouts because my bed just looks so damn comfortable and I’ll leave the dishes dirty in the sink until the final moment where there is not a clean cup. I’m an actual walking version of a hot mess sometimes. Because, while most of us want to portray the idealistic picture that we have our shit together; I’ll be on the couch eating pirate booty and binge watching Flip or Flop wondering why Tarek and Christina couldn’t make it work.

While you’re probably reading this and thinking, “what the hell you lazy piece of shit,” I’m going to give you perspective on why I really don’t see a problem with any of the things above that I’ve listed. While I look in the mirror and don’t always love what I see, at the end of most of my days I’m happier I chose to enjoy my day instead of beating myself up about every little thing. While I feel like a crazy girlfriend sometimes getting mad over every little thing it seems, I remember that Justin knows exactly what to say and do to make me smile and that’s something I’ve dreamed about having my whole life. While I feel like a shitty friend sometimes for being so busy, I remember that they’re busy too and while we’re out hustling, (taking a nap while we said we were working out and getting homework done and far too lazy to get up) we’re all supporting each other from afar no matter what. And when I put so much pressure on myself with my school work, I realize that I’m doing everything I can and if I kill myself trying, it doesn’t help it only hurts.

Work ethic is something I take pride in and feel I have a lot of. But, I am honestly working toward that everyday and everyday I face a new obstacle I may or may not have put there by simply being myself. I want to remain humble and honest and undeniably, 100% myself. I will always try and hold myself to a higher standard and accomplish as much as I can but with that, comes taking too long of a break and having “fat” days. I may not know all of you or know what goes on within your days but if you’re anything like me just remember you’re only human. I’m not here to give advice or to talk down like I know everything, I’m here to remind you that after you work your ass off and put the meaning of hard work on another level, to take an extra long nap, eat that damn cookie and enjoy everyday like you don’t have tomorrow.

XOXO,

It’s fine. I’m fine. We’re all fine.

PS- sorry for all the cussing but if it offends you, we probably can’t be friends.