Perfection is Not Key

So, I’m starting to get the impression from my own posts so far that on the outside it looks like I have this solid outlook on life and that everything is perfect for me. WELL, when I started this blog, not only did I want to do it for me & me alone, I always wanted to remain honest for whatever readers I did obtain.

While I respect the blogging world and all those who populate it- I don’t ever want to come off as someone who has a perfect life. Instagram and other social media sources are the ultimate platform to portray perfection. Having said that, I am very happy and I love my life. I wouldn’t change it for the world. Does that make it perfect? Hell. No. Perfection is boring if you ask me. There’s no substance, no raw ability to those types of folks who live to preach such a life. Mistakes have taught me everything and I intend to keep making them for that reason, not because I want to fail but because I know I have a lot of learning left to do. So, I guess what I’m getting at is: I’m not perfect, I don’t wanna be. I fail, I have confidence issues, I’m moody and I don’t always have my sh** together. I’m human. 

Currently, I’m a student. And while this blogging distracts me from the whirling pit of my scholastic downfalls, I do have to put in work on the daily. My relationship with school has always been a “toughy” so to speak. I just barely didn’t pass a math class I really needed last semester after being told by my own teacher (I still have the email to prove it and maybe might frame it.. is that weird?) that my hard work didn’t parallel anyone else in my class. Hearing that and then not passing by only FOUR PERCENT (nooo, I’m not bitter at all…..) was heartbreaking. This post isn’t to gain pity (ok maybe a little from other math haters out there) but to showcase my biggest flaw, in my opinion: SCHOOL. It has never come easy for me and I’m currently waiting to hear back from universities to see if my hard work has paid off or not. My ultimate dream is to be a published writer with a pretty diploma hanging on my wall. It may sound simple to some but it is all I’ve ever wanted. Starting my blog has helped me release some creative tension my brain needs to release and I’m so happy with the way its turning out so far! There is no “right way” to do this, I’ve learned so far. I’m not even sure where I want to take this but for now, I’m happy and that’s all a girl can ask for.

I just have to keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason. It’s so true! If you were wondering, yes I am in the process of retaking said math class and plan to absolutely crush it. This is to all the people who feel like perfection is suffocating and for those who have to try a little harder. I’m with ya. You are you and that speaks volumes. It is easier said than done to accept flaws and to realize that mistakes are inevitable- but the least we can do is try.

Thank you for reading and also sorry for the continuous life preaching.

XOXO, The English Major Who Has Math Phobia.